Dennis Hopper is Destroying My Garden…

Let me explain:  In my family we have a tradition of giving things names… I drive a Yukon that we call Mr. T, praying mantis’ are all called Oscar, those big black carpenter bees are Albert…

And the bunnies that live in my yard are all called, you guessed it, Dennis Hopper.

And Dennis Hopper is eating everything in my yard:

Sure he looks all soft and fuzzy.  Look at those cute little ears standing up at attention, those clear bright eyes, his sweet little mouth munching on… MY FLOWERS! 

He tries to hide when he realizes he’s been spotted:

But we know he’s there, grazing on my flowers and vegetables in the garden.  We even left a ton of dandelions in the yard for him to chew on; we know he loves those…

He’s gotten pretty bold too.  Almost any time of day I might hear one of the kids yell, ‘Dennis Hopper!’  Usually followed by, ‘can I chase him out of the yard?’ 

Now, please note that I am a wildlife lover.  Last year when a six point buck walked just outside our yard, I called all the kids to quietly come watch him.  When ducklings cross the road on their way to the pond, I’ve stood in the road to ensure their safe passage.  Why, just yesterday, I picked up this thing and put it back on the grass to get it out of the road:

Which, by the way, I will never do again. 

Note to readers: Do not be stupid like me and attempt to pick up a snapping turtle, unless you don’t entirely enjoy having all ten fingers firmly attached to your hands.  (Yes, I managed to keep all of mine.  Barely.) 

Back to Dennis Hopper.  I love the idea of sharing our yard with the critters that naturally live there.  When we see bunnies hopping around the backyard, minding their own business and not eating my plants, the kids are not allowed to run outside and freak them out.  After all, our backyard is their home.  But…

Would it be too much to ask for you to QUIT EATING MY PLANTS!

Since I’m pretty sure that Dennis Hopper can’t differentiate between wild plants and the plants that I’ve put there for the express purpose of my personal backyard enjoyment, I imagine we’ll be chasing him around the yard quite a bit this summer. 

Hopefully, he’ll leave enough of my plants alone so that I’ll actually get to see some of them bloom.  Maybe.  ; )